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Friday, January 04, 2008

The Year In Review -- of MEMEMEMEMEME

Today’s episode of Little Miss Know-it-All: LOOK AT ME! I’M A REPORTER! REALLY, I AM! YES, I AM!

Is the Globe’s Style section getting worse, or am I just crankier than usual?

End-of-year articles are normal. They’re not good, but they’re normal. Newspaper staff want to take time off, but the publisher still needs to deliver a certain number of ads to readers. Something’s got to go in between those ads, and there’s a limit to the number of I’m-so-embarrassed-about-being-vapid-but-damn-it’s-fun-to-be-vapid columns Leah McLaren can crank out in a week. (Tomorrow: Leah tries to be nice to homeless people, but decides to drink Cosmos instead.)

So the editor orders up some year-in-review text to fill the space between the ads. Don’t worry: Sarah Hampson leaps to the occasion.

I’m not sure why I never noticed Ms. Hampson until recently. Like our friend Ms. Eckler, she is on a crusade to convince the world that her own personal situation is the hottest ticket around. Goody. That’s what we really need in the newspaper: another woman who is willing to debase herself for 25 cents a word. And so we’ve been subjected to story after story explaining why divorced women are sexy. It’s too bad, because I think there’s a place for a columnist who wants to write about life after divorce. This, however, is not exactly what I had in mind.

Ms. Hampson brings us the 2007 Review Of – wait for it – Ms. Hampson’s Interviews. This is hard to believe, but apparently, reporters interview people. Yes. I was amazed, too. The opening anecdote is about an actor who, shockingly, thought Ms. Hampson was stupid. Not being intelligent enough to catch on, Ms. Hampson was “as ecstatic as a schoolboy who has just uncovered a stash of Playboy magazines.” Nice.

But wait! There’s more!

Ms. Hampson has also interviewed marijuana enthusiast Marc Emery. (Um, ditto. Who hasn’t, I ask you?) And Howie Mandel! And Leonard Cohen! What a career she must have! She is so glamorous. I bet that if she wasn’t a reporter who is willing to give people free newspaper coverage for their pathetic projects, D-list celebrities like Tia Tequila would STILL want to talk to her. She’s just the kind of person who attracts that sort of attention. Sit back and admire her.

Is 2008 going to be any better?

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

You just did-enT say that she interviewed Howie and Leonard? I soooo have to meet this person wow.

I once shook the hand of a local politician... I haven't washed it since!

Ahhhhhh.... must go dream

Panic said...

Ah ha ha! You're fantastic. :)

Anonymous said...

Sadly, I too have been reading some of Sarah Hampson's columns recently. On reflection, perhaps its the editors trying to create controversy to get a few more readers, with all the post-40 divorced woman sex stuff??

But I find her articles to be drivel. She has an article today about Ghost Dads, which to my eyes is just a public attack on whoever her ex-husband is by saying the guy is cruel to his kids!! Where is HIS point of view? Maybe the crazy Sarah H has driven him from their life? Who knows.

But the G&M makes all of her articles FULLY MODERATED, and they literally CENSOR most comments that criticize her ideas openly. Try it, post a critical comment, and they censor it. What hypocrites.

They must be trying to attract older female readers?
Or maybe its just a social-political agenda?

Megan said...

Anonymous: Welcome!

I often do reviews of Canadian journalism. I hope you'll stick around: I'll be going back to the regular format after the Being David Hasselhoff contest is over. You can access the archives through the links on the right-hand side.

Anonymous said...

I've actually worked on a Hasslehoff movie when he was in town. Nice guy, he was sober then!
:-)

Maybe Sarah Hampson should hook up with The Hoff?

I guess The Hoff and Sarah Hampson are both making hay/money/PR out of their ugly divorces.