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Sunday, June 03, 2007

Maybe she's just pieces of me you've never seen well

Twelve things you probably didn't know about me:

  1. I am an old-fashioned prude. This both horrifies me and gives me some comfort. It horrifies me because it's clearly uncontrollable and I don't want to pass it on to my son. It gives me comfort because it's been with me forever and I'm a sucker for anything that's been around for a while.
  2. I like to hurt myself. I push needles under my fingernails until they bleed. The more it hurts, the more I poke. I'll rip my own skin out.
  3. On a related note, I pull my own hair out one strand at a time. You know how you use scissors to curl the ends of ribbons? I use my fingernails to curl the plucked hairs this way.
  4. I almost died after my appendix burst when I was eight.
  5. Of all the people I hung out with in high school, only two (maybe three) of them were straight. I have no idea how this happened and don't know what to make of it, but it's far beyond the realm of statistical probability. No, don't point out that I was in the drama club, the vocal ensemble and le club francais. That doesn't explain it.
  6. I live in terror that Michael will eat a peanut.
  7. Steve thinks I have freaky baby toes because they are very short. I think his are too long.
  8. Although a relative has suggested it, I have no intention of checking into a nunnery any time soon.
  9. I write silly metered rhyming poetry (think Dr. Seuss).
  10. The Goo Goo Dolls are my guilty pleasure. I am embarrassed just typing these words. No, I don't own any of their music or know any of the titles of their songs: this would require work, and I cannot allow myself to put any energy into this when I somehow feel that the whole thing ought to be done from deep inside a closet.
  11. I cannot reconcile the last item with my shameless Michael W. Smith and REO Speedwagon collections.
  12. I am passive-aggressive. It is easier for me to pretend to like someone than to address the problems I have with him or her. Every once in a while, I snap and become vicious. I pretend this doesn't actually happen.


Torq said...

The Goo Goo Dolls are a great band!

Steve & Megan said...

Yeah, I can't explain it.

Dad said...

This is it????
Too prudish??? A burst appendix???
So, this is the dark side????

You didn't pull the legs off an insect?
You didn't steal money from poor box?
You never made fun of an immigrant?
Come to think of it...
No, you never did.