Beer and popcorn

Got my $100 cheque from Prime Minister Harper for my beer and popcorn today.

It turns out that I am not a small-c conservative, as I've thought for years. Not even a Canadian conservative. It turns out that I'm something much closer to a libertarian. This sucks. If there is a Libertarian Party in Canada, I don't know about it. And this is the country where we have a Marijuana Party and an Animal Alliance Environment Party.

I fought this for the longest time. I'm actually a registered Republican. When I watched other people who called themselves small-c conservatives on TV, I convinced myself that they were the ones who were deluded about what it meant to be conservative. Small government, right? Fiscal restraint? Limited government intervention in people's lives? I'm for all of those things, and I thought they were too.

I'll pay for schools and roads and cops. I'll even pay for roads I don't drive on. But don't expect me to be happy about using tax dollars to renovate a politician's office or design a new government logo or develop make-work projects that exist only so that people can be eligible for MORE free government money. (I'm talking to YOU, Newfoundland.) And I don't want to see another penny of my taxes spent on deciding whether same-sex couples can get married.

It's odd that people who say they want the federal government to stay out of their business are so quick to insist that other people's lives should be regulated. I still can't figure out why any secular government would care if same-sex couples get married, or even if three people wanted to get married to each other.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I want another husband. I'm looking for someone to clean my house, cook my dinner and generally do anything I want without complaining. To get that, I'm going to need a wife.