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Sunday, November 16, 2008

What’s A Stuffed Norbert?

When you win a contest, you’re supposed to get something cool. What’s her face got a storm trooper’s helmet that could very well have given some much needed confidence to my community patrol. The reflective vests they wear now don’t go well with their “boy I hope nothing happens while we’re out here” kind of approach to citizen’s on the lookout.

The crocodile head could have served me well as a conversation piece at children’s parties.

“What’s that mister?”

“Stop talking or I’ll bring it back to life to eat you!”

No, instead of that or a stuffed Norbert (I haven’t even tried to find out what that is) I got to blog here. Not that this is un-cool but I actually had to figure out what on earth I could do to pump out content for a day to satisfy you people. Frankly, Megan’s blog is tough to live up to and I’m very lazy. Her posts are creative and attract comments from you the readers. I think I know why the blog is so good though and since I have this space to use, I think that it is incumbent upon me to reveal the creative edge that Megan has enjoyed for so long before I am banished back to my own blog for the rest of eternity. Yes, you should know why she is able to blog as she does and why her blog remains entertaining and fresh after all this time.

She’s crrAAaaaaaAaaAAZZZzzzyyy!

You see, this is a blog bought to you from the frozen wasteland up north that many Canadians know as “oh dear god no! You couldn’t pay me enough!” or “Yeah…it’s cold up there!” No one actually lives there aside from people who got lost hiking, took a wrong turn during a road trip or survived an airplane crash. I mean sure, there are a few oil riggers and diamond miners up there that have homes further south but people generally steer clear of the place. Megan can’t get out on her own so she has survived all this time by blogging. It’s not only her creative outlet but also the only connection she has to the real world…you know…the one with foliage?

Now don’t think for a second that I’m telling you to stop reading or commenting. You need to continue to humour her and tell her that it’s a good thing she works for the justice department. It doesn’t matter that the justice department up there consists of two polar bears and a penguin, just remember that it’s all she has. Remember to keep commenting and keep this poor gal company. She needs people like us. I just thought I would use my parting post here to explain some of the mystery behind this blog.

You can trust me and the credibility of my words. I’m a contest winner. So long and thanks for all the fish everyone.


Megan said...

The stormtrooper helmet actually glows in the dark. It's pretty awesome.

But these posts have also been awesome. Thanks for being part of the contest.

Zach Bell said...

Heh heh.I hope your readers weren't thrown off too too much.

Alex said...

I don't know what's what anymore! Up is....over there? Which way is down!? WAAAAAAAHHHHGARRRRBLLLLEEEEEEE

Zach Bell said...


A common word in the northernmost reaches of Canada meaning confusion or "look at the kitty!"


Torq said...

Yeah, Megan does give out really odd things. For my wedding I got a statue of two trolls who appear to be making out (I am weird, so I think this is pretty cool and so it sits on my coffee table). My next gift from her involved a group of Philosopher finger puppets.

I was very tempted to stage a discussion between Nietzsche and Hegel debiting "the Hoff." Oh well... Maybe next time!

Anonymous said...

let me just say congrats to megan for actualy finding an internet connection, you know how hard it is here, when we all live in igloos

And poler bears, in the justice department?! Everyone knows they are to busy taxiing everyone around on their backs to do whatever that is!

*sigh* daddy just speard down a caribo, i have to get skining... new pair of mucklucks, here i come!

arcticgirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Zach Bell said...

I would say "living" in an igloo is a pretty far stretch. You people survive up there very well though. Congrats to you all and I hope you enjoy your new moccasins there Anonymous.


Torq said...

hmmm... I seem to have written "debiting" rather than "debating" in my above post. That wouldn't make a whole lot of sense! Thank you for leaving my head/body connection alone.

Zach Bell said...

I just assumed you were expressing a latent but strong vein of Australianism in your post. I assume every one else came to the same conclusion.