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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

I hate elevator music, the way we fight, the way I'm left here silent

It occurs to me that I am never really going to be happy, simply because I cannot manage to be truly unhappy.

True unhappiness is a kick in the pants. You can't stand things any more. You have to change it up, and you know exactly what has to be done. Even if it's painful, you know you can't keep things the way they are. That pain will be temporary, and you'll be replacing your current situation with something that will be better, even if it's unfamiliar and a little bit scary. Okay, a lot scary.

I'm never going to get to that point. I'm in some sort of weird no man's land where there are distinctions between unhappiness and un-happiness.


Ricki said...

It's just called "adulthood," isn't it? (and don't worry, things will change again when you get old enough--something to look forward to!)

Mongoose said...

I think the key to not being unhappy is to quit trying or wanting or expecting to be happy. Getting through crappy times into better times isn't gonna make you happy - believe me, I've done it a few times. Like Abraham Lincoln said, most people are about as happy as they make up their mind to be. Just make up your mind to be happy with what you have, even if that includes feeling melancholy at times.

Anonymous said...

Love you, Meg.

Cindy said...

I love you, too.

You will get through this.

Anonymous said...

Write a book so I can be where you are!

Torq said...

I think many (most maybe) people have a lot of trouble with being happy because they have never spent any time thinking about what happiness actually IS. We have all these "images" of things which are supposed to either make us happy or to be happiness its self. The tragedy is that most of them don't have anything to do with actual happiness.

That said, I don't want to give the impression that I know any more about what true happiness is than anyone else. Aristotle suggested that true happiness consisted of being good and doing good, and maybe he is right.